True stories and practical advice for women about how to feel better today
This book is for anyone who's ever sacrificed her own happiness trying to make someone else happy . . . who's assigned her happiness, one more time, to some future date “in a galaxy far, far away.” It's no big deal, happiness can wait. And—duh—it does.
But it doesn't have to. With And Then I'll Be Happy!, relationship writer and former saboteur of her own happiness, Kristen Houghton, gives women the tools they need to shake off the unhappiness epidemic. In a beguiling blend of practical advice and humor, she debunks the myths about how and when women find happiness. Houghton presents true stories of women who put their happiness on hold for different reasons, provides tips on what readers can do to avoid a similar problem, and identifies the major mindsets that keep women from happiness.
With this book, women everywhere—whether in the midst of their careers, choosing to be stay-at-home moms, or caring for aging parents—can put their happiness right where it belongs: in the present.
Kristen Houghton writes the exceedingly popular column Relationships for Examiner.com, which has millions of readers worldwide. She is a regular guest on radio talk shows.
Introduction: The Elusive State of Happiness
The Key to Relationships: Never Let Any One Person Be in Charge of Your Happiness
The Key to Avoiding Being a Have-Not: To Have and Have-Not Isn't Just the Name of an Old Movie
The Key to Good Parenting: Crumbs from Caesar's Table - A Mommy Tale
The Key to Becoming Your Own Person:Being Good Little Girl” No Matter What Your Age
The Key to Love and Self-Acceptance: I Don't Deserve to be Happy Until the Thin Lady Sings
The Key to Saving Yourself: The Love of a Good Woman Will Not Change a Bad Man
The Key to Allowing Your Dreams to Become Your Plans: When Someday Never Comes
Chapter 8. The Key to Surviving an Affair: He's Married…But Not to You
The Key to Saying No and Reclaiming Yourself: Has Anyone Here Seen My Life?
The Key to Trying: Just Doing It
The Key to Learning That Perfection Isn't Happiness: The “Perfect” Woman Needs a Break
The Key Living Life Fully: Preparing for and Creating Your Own Opportunities
Afterword: The (Finally) Attainable State of Happiness
“Any woman who wants to find out how she may be sabotaging her happiness needs this book!”
—Carolyn Chambers Clark, Ed.D., author of Living Well with Anxiety and Living Well with Menopause
“Remember Goldilocks and the Three Bears? Nothing was ever good enough for that girl! A master observer of women and relationships, Kristen Houghton uses her funny, warm, and deeply engaging style to open us up to the ways that we, as women, chronically postpone and deny our own happiness. As a clinical psychologist, I constantly see women in states of depression, low self-esteem, and body hatred. I am grateful to Kristen, who masterfully gets past our defensiveness to show us new ways to discover self-acceptance, inner peace and happiness. Thank you, Kristen, for your groundbreaking book. It's about time someone addressed the concerns felt deeply in our hearts and showed us innovative, insightful ways to heal them! This book is a must read for any woman who puts herself last on her exhaustive ‘to do' list.”
—Maria Rago, PhD, Clinical Director, Rago & Associates Counseling Center; psychological consultant for women's issues
“Kristen Houghton is truly an inspiring writer, one whose ‘girlfriend therapy' is the best kind of advice any woman can receive. She is candid, up-to-the minute on what today's woman needs, and spices up her prose with a humor we can all use in our lives. Her writing is unparalleled in this arena, and her advice motivates her readers. All women need to read this book, and read it now! It is fresh, and filled with solid advice for anyone who has, as Kristen Houghton so perfectly writes, found happiness to be elusive in their lives.”
—Diane Lang, MSW, adjunct professor of psychology, Montclair State University; therapist, Livingston Institute of Psychology; author of Baby Steps: The Path from Motherhood to Career
“Kristen Houghton's writing thrives as she creates compelling articles for her nationally syndicated Relationship column. Her insight into relationship problems and their solutions is brilliant! Humorous, realistic, and right on the mark, she is the best relationship writer out there.”
—Greg Archer, San Francisco Examiner
“Kristen's heartfelt perspectives are seasoned with frankness and wisdom, yet are boldly refreshing. Her advice, when heeded, will help you revive a relationship, reinvent your life, and make positive changes! This book on women and happiness is one I recommend wholeheartedly. It is an insightful, wonderful dose of reality. Great writing!”
—Bill Mitchell, the 7 Day Detective, author of The More You Know: Getting the Evidence and Support You Need to Investigate a Troubled Relationship
“With a sharp, witty persona, Kristen Houghton tackles relationship building with humor. Her material is at times eye-popping, getting her message and guidance across with a juicy tone that garners attention. I suspect we'll be hearing a lot from her in 2009 as we all battle the recession, try to keep a handle on our relationships, and attempt to keep a smile on our faces.”
—Judy Martin, Emmy–award winning broadcast journalist, reporter for National Public Radio; writer/radio anchor at CNBC Radio
“Kristen Houghton is a brilliant writer who always writes timely and informative features. I look forward to reading her column on a daily basis—I never know what the articles are going to be about, but I know I can always expect a clever and entertaining story written by an expert in the field. Writing a book that encourages women to attain their goals and find their own happiness was the next logical step for Kristen. Her book is a definite must read!”
—Danielle Duff, columnist, Washington Examiner